MAGIC WEATHER SPONGE

'Frank E Chans Weather Show' is a popular part of  'Gutten Morning Fatherland'

ONCE UPON A TIME THE PEOPLE OF DEAL MADE THEIR LIVING BY ROBBING FROM THE SHIPS THAT SUNK ON THE GOODWIN* SANDS, SHIPS LIKE 'TERRANOVA", "NEW SUCCESS" AND "BLIND FORTUNE".

HERE IS AN EXTRACT FROM ONE OF DANIEL DEFOE'S DIARIES ABOUT DEAL AND THE CREATION OF A LEGEND:

"AND ONE DAY THEIR WAS A MIGHTY TEMPEST WHICH SUCKED ANOTHER VESSEL INTO THE SHIP SWALLOWER. BEHOLD THIS WAS POTENTIALLY VERY LUCRATIVE FOR THE TOWNS FOLK. BUT LO THEY HATH ALL GONE TO WEMBELY TO WATCH THE FA VASE FINAL, LEAVING THE TOWN DESERTED.

UPON HIS RETURN THE MAJOR OF DEAL 'FERRIT ERRISS' DECREED THAT A DEVICE MUST BE CREATED THAT WOULD ALLOW THE TOWN TO JUDGE THE WEATHER AND THEREFORE KNOW WHEN A STORM WAS LIKELY TO HIT.

THUS THE GREAT MINDS OF DEAL (LIKE RON LOWBECK WHO LIVES DOWN LEONARD'S RD**) CREATED THE MAGIC WEATHER SPONGE- AN ITEM THAT ALLOWED ACCURATE FORECASTING OF THE WEATHER."

THIS MEANT THAT THE TOWNS FOLK COULD TELL WHEN A STORM WAS COMING AND GET READY FOR A GOOD SINKING, RATHER THAN BEING SAT IN A LONDON PUB TRYING TO GET FRANK TO SWAP HIS SCARF FOR A QUICK PERV. 

RECENTLY THE WEATHER SPONGE HAS GONE MISSING AND THE FORTUNES OF DEALS THIEVING COMMUNITY HAVE STRUGGLED SOME WHAT.

WE THINK THAT BUNGIE OR MAJOR KEN MAY HAVE IT.

*THE GOODWIN SANDS ARE OWNED BY COLIN GOODWIN, WHO IS ALSO KNOWN AS FISH.  THIS MEANS THAT HE HAS THE RIGHT TO GRAZE HIS SHEP ON THE SANDS AT ANY TIME.

**ST LEONARD'S ROAD WAS ORIGINALLY JUST CALLED 'LEONARD'S ROAD' BEFORE HE BECAME A SAINT IN 1957 WHEN HE SAW A VISION OF THE HOLY TRINITY (TORRICHELLI, MALDINI AND DEL PIERO) IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HELL HOLE WHICH IS DOVER MARKET SQUARE.

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